Melissa called our hotline on a Saturday morning after being assaulted by her partner the night before. They had been homeless for several months along with 2 children. Both she and her partner were active Meth addicts. Stability was not in the immediate future for this family. I picked her up from a friend’s apartment and he was waiting outside to keep her intimidated .... more...





Stalking

Stalking is a pattern of behavior directed at a specific person that would put a reasonable person in fear. This can include a pattern of harassing, threatening, or intimidating conduct that makes another fear for her/his safety.


Things Stalkers Do:

  • Making unwanted phone calls
  • Sending unwanted gifts, letter, cards, or e-mail
  • Drives by your home, school, or work
  • Threaten to hurt you
  • Threaten to hurt you, your family, friends, or pets
  • Contacting family, friends, neighbors, or co-workers for information on you
  • Use a tracking device on or in your car
  • Leave unwanted items, presents, or flowers
  • Show up at places where they had no reason to be
  • Damages your home, car, or personal property

1 in 4 report some form of cyber stalking.

Things You Can Do:

  • Keep your family, friends, & co-workers informed regarding the stalking behavior
  • Trust your instincts. If you feel unsafe, you probably are
  • Keep a journal or log of all stalking incidents
  • Keep all letters, packages, e-mail messages, taped phone messages, receive by the stalker
  • Ask family, friends & co-workers to keep a log of the stalkers contact with them in seeking information on you
  • If you are in immediate danger, call 911
  • Take threats seriously. Danger can be higher when the stalker talks about suicide or murder, or when the victim tries to leave the relationship
  • Develop a safety plan, including things like changing your routine, have friends and family go places with you, or have a co-worker or security if you have it, walk you to your car when at work
  • If the stalker shows up have a safety plan in place that you could implement
  • Have no communication with the stalker from you end
  • Take out a stalking order when you are able

1 in 7 victims reported moving as a result of stalking

Common Reactions To Being Stalked

  • Loss of sleep
  • Nightmares
  • Depression
  • Difficulty concentrating
  • Anxiety
  • Hyper-vigilance
  • Flashbacks
  • Stress
  • Isolation
  • Frustration
  • Confusion
  • Think you are going crazy

What can friends or families do to support a victim of stalking:

Listen, believe what they are saying, don’t blame the victim don’t tell the victim what to do, support what ever decision the victim makes, find a local police or shelter, to get information in helping a victim.

It is important to remember every situation is different, and the person being stalked needs to make her/his choices about how they want to handle the stalking.

Approximately 60% of stalking victims do not report to the police.

Planning For Your Safety:

  • Leave your home if it is unsafe
  • Secure the outside of your home
  • Check to see you have fresh light bulbs in your outside lights
  • Carry a cell phone on you at all times
  • Have several 911 phone plugged in different rooms of your home
  • Have an emergency get-away kit
  • Let someone know where you will be at all times
  • Hidden security cameras strategically placed if you can afford
  • A pair of binoculars to check down the street before leaving your home or work
  • A camera to use either at home or in your car
  • Change your routine in going to work, seeing family or friends

Websites for more information

http://www.bullyonline.org/related/stalking.htm

http://www.stalkingvictims.com/survival/menu.htm

http://www.stalkingbehavior.com/preventions.htm

http://www.lovemenot.org/default2.htm

http://www.ovw.usdoj.gov/abutstalking.htm

Local resources:

Henderson House
610 SE 1st Street
McMinnville OR 97128
24 hour Crisis Line: 503.472.1503

County courthouse
535 NE 5th Street
McMinnville, OR 97128
Crime Victim’s Assistance Office: 503.434.7510

Your local police department if wanting to file a stalking order can help in issuing a stalking ticket to the stalker.

YCOM - Non Emergency Number
McMinnville Police & Sheriff Dept.: 503.434.6500

Newberg Dispatch-Non Emergency Number
Newberg & Dundee Police Dept.: 503.538.8321